Coming Out



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It’s pointless to reinvent the wheel, so most of this will be links to other resources that we’ve verified.

Before coming out to others, you must come out to yourself. You have to accept yourself and be sure that you are trans, before you come out, because you don’t know how it will turn out after you do. You might still be questioning, especially if you’ve only just realized that you’re trans, and doubly so if you don’t experience dysphoria (not everyone does). Just relax, take it easy and don’t rush into things. Even with a supportive environment, you should be ready mentally before you come out.

This is not to say that you should delay coming out. It’s your life, and you need to start being honest with yourself and living a life that is you. Your life is your own, and no one else’s, and you should always live your own life in a way that makes you comfortable. That is, if it’s safe to do so. Conditions for transgender people is getting better in a lot of places these days, but there are still many places on earth where some people may rightly feel uncomfortable.

It’s up to you to decide whether and when you come out. If you do, make sure to have support first and make sure that you’re prepared.

It’s OK to be trans! Really! It’s who you are, and the sooner you accept yourself and embrace your identity, the better. Regardless of whatever happens, you may even wonder why you didn’t come out sooner! Coming out can improve your life in so many ways, in ways which you can’t even articulate at the moment.

LGBT Youth Scotland

WARNING: the PDF below uses outdated terms like transsexual, and barely mentions non-binary people. We wish to remove all external links on the transchat site and have our own information on the website. The PDF also confuses the definitions of genderqueer and genderfluid.

This organisation has a useful coming out guide on their website: https://web.archive.org/web/20170827010912/https://www.lgbtyouth.org.uk/files/documents/guides/Coming_out_guide_-_T.pdf

Although sexuality has nothing to do with gender, they also have a guide for coming out as gay, lesbian or bi. Some trans people are also one of these (many are also heterosexual), just like some cis people can be gay/lesbian/bi. Here it is: https://web.archive.org/web/20170827010913/https://www.lgbtyouth.org.uk/yp-resources-trans

Stop-homophobia.com

This guide is also useful (although it repeats much of what is on the LGBT Youth Scotland guide): https://web.archive.org/web/20160901185319/http://www.stop-homophobia.com/coming-out-as-trans

Markdown file for this page: https://trans.chat/coming-out.md

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